"Graph-Theoretic" and "Graphical" Language in the Description of Marriages

This Onion article makes me realize that one can describe marriage laws very precisely using graph theory: allowing non-bipartite graphs, allowing hypergraphs, etc.

Clearly, the outcomes of the court cases ought to be written using graph-theoretic (or, to use a perhaps unfortunate pun, "graphical") language.

Note: I have no comment about self-edges.