Cooking: Yet Another Sign of the Apocalypse

I remember telling people that it would probably take an apocalypse for me to start cooking...

And, well, here we are.

(The picture above is the first in a sequence of five pictures. I ate those noodles out of sheer stubbornness.)

Human Cooker: Order now at Sears

Surely, this is somebody's idea of a practical joke, right? Right?

In case the Sears website in question gets altered or removed (and I'm guessing it probably will, as there will likely be some serious fallout), the top left of the page has the following tree to get to the page above: "Human Cooking > Grills to Cook Babies and More > Body Part Roaster"

I think somebody's head is going to roll (and then maybe be cooked with this thing)...

(Tip of the cap to Scott Porter.)