Awesome Ballpark Promotion: Free Jayson Werth Chia Pets

The Washington Nationals are giving away Jayson Werth Chia Pets at their baseball game tonight. I approve! Note: I don't know how well Chia Pets are known these days, but I remember seeing tons of commercials for them when I was a kid.

Urinal Gaming System

Well, it looks like a urinal gaming system is about to be installed in a minor league baseball stadium. Yes, you read that right. Alright, let's have a contest: The article's lead ("Triple-A park to feature interactive urinal game") is the straight line. You provide the joke.

(There are actually plenty of jokes in the article, but I am sure that many of you can do much better. Additionally, I wonder if Wiimotes will be allowed?)