Saturday, November 19, 2005

High school reunions

I meant to write about this almost a couple weeks ago.

My sister had her 10-year high school reunion around 11/5, and she enjoyed it (in part to her low expectations entering the game). I briefly entertained the thought of crashing it because there were a couple of my friends from her graduation year that I knew were planning to attend. However, I don't feel particularly comfortable infiltrating other people's parties (funny that), so seeing them got punted. (Actually, one of them is supposed to be around for Thanksgiving weekend, so that's good.)

My own 10-year reunion was held in October 2004, and I similarly had a lot of fun at it. A lot of the people I wanted to see didn't show up, but I still enjoyed it quite a bit. It seemed like everybody there was either a lawyer or a lesbian (and some were both), but I suppose that's what one is supposed to observe. One thing that was bloody hilarous was that just about all the Persians were almost completely bald, because back in the day, those guys bragged incessantly about how much hair they had. Not that I should laugh about this happening to other people, but I absolutely love irony. :) Some people seemed very inclined to show people how successful they were (or, in one case, how successful their spouse was). My general reaction to that kind of stuff was indifference, because I don't need to prove my success or lack thereof to anybody else, and besides rooting for my friends in general, I'm not going to judge anybody's worth by their level of career success. (Moreover, my career track is so different from those of my classmates that that alone distinguishes me from the crowd whether or not I do well with this career. I've never had any trouble being an interesting personl. Whether one means that in a good way or a bad way depends on the person you ask.) I like being different from everbody else---"ten standard deviations from the norm" and proud of it! (That comment was made by a Georgia Tech colleague about my personality, not about any career stuff.)

The other thing I noted was that the people who really wanted to talk to me at the reunion aren't necessarily the same people who wanted to talk to me in high school. Of course, this isn't surprising, but I didn't actually think about it before my reunion. It's certainly much hipper to be a nerd in his late 20s than a nerd in his late teens. Again, this isn't particularly surprising. (My advice: bring a slide rule to your reunions when the time comes.)

7 comments:

Linda said...

I didn't go to my high school reunion. My high school years were difficult. I wanted to fit in, and I didn't. The rich kids and preppies made fun of my style. The nerds said I was too preppy. I was a real loner with very few friends. Now, I don't mind having my own style and being a leader. I'm glad that your high school reunion was a wonderful experience.

Mason said...

My high school years weren't always easy (by any stretch of the imagination...), but that had nothing to do with whether I wanted to attend my reunion. The people who made fun of me found better things to do, like drugs. I just didn't hang out with the preppy people, which at my high school was almost everybody, and even most of them grow to realize that people on the nerdy side of things are very much worthwhile. I can continue to ignore those that don't. I've never been burdened by caring about what other people think. People might hit my own nerves now and then, but I pretty much worry only about the opinions of people I consider worthwhile. (Sometimes I go too far, in terms of my own elitism, but I think I am better off erring this way than the other way.) I only need to prove things to myself, not to anyone else.

Linda said...

My high school comprised of two main groups: the preppies and the nerds. Now, I am fine being "singular".

Mason said...

Not only am I singular, but I'm not removable! Even more, I'm no mere pole (though my grandparents are Polish) or even a branch point. Rather, I am an essential singularity! Try to integrate [over] me now!

(OK, so that had a series of awful puns, but I couldn't resist.)

Linda said...

Funny Mason. I am singular and have a unique solution. Nite! (Yes, I know, the nite is still young!!)

Anonymous said...

There's a certain amount of curiosity that will probably drive me to go to my high school reunion. However, this is mostly curiosity about people I wasn't particularly close to, since I still keep in touch with my close friends from that era. So at a certain level this implies socializing with people I didn't like all that much, which isn't an appealing prospect.

Earlier this year I came across a group blog by a certain clique composed of my high school classmates, and it was amazing how their mentality had never really left high school. That was one thing that made me think I could go ahead and skip the reunion. But probably they're the exception and most of the people from my class have matured a bit.

My high school did have a large preppy contingent, with their own kind of social hierarchy that was very opaque to me. There was actually a kind of self-imposed segregation where all the cool kids would eat lunch on the south side of the dining hall and the nerds, smokers, and band geeks would eat on the north side. For a while I was hanging out with a crowd of math/science geeks, but (surprisingly) didn't quite feel I fit in; eventually I managed to locate some other misfits, and our splinter faction continues to plot world domination to this day.

Ah, high school...

Mason said...

I think a decent number of people mature. I still think that 28-year-olds tend to view nerds their age much more positively than do high-schoolers. (Most of the nerds do end up being pretty successful, after all.)

The night is young: And the moon is Gibbous Waning. (It would have been cool if it were full, but alas...)